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| Sunday, May 10th, 2009 | | 7:09 am |
We must not slump in dejection or shut ourselves away
SOURCE: http://penelope.uchicago.edu/Thayer/E/Roman/Texts/Plutarch/Moralia/Consolatio_ad_uxorem*.htmlDo, however, try to carry yourself back in your thoughts and return again and again to the time when this little child was not yet born and we had as yet no complaint against Fortune; next try to link this present time with that as though our circumstances had again become the same.32 For, my dear wife, we shall appear to be sorry that our child was ever born33 if our conduct leads us to regard the state p597of things before her birth as preferable to the present. EYet we must not obliterate the intervening two years from our memory; rather, since they afforded us delight and enjoyment of her, we should credit them to the account of pleasure; and we should not consider the small good a great evil, nor, because Fortune did not add what we hoped for, be ungrateful for what was given.34 For reverent language toward the Deity and a serene and uncomplaining attitude toward Fortune never fail to yield an excellent and pleasant return; while in circumstances like these he who in greatest measure draws upon his memory of past blessings and turns his thought toward the bright and radiant part of his life, averting it from the dark and disturbing part, Feither extinguishes his pain entirely, or by thus combining it with its opposite, renders it slight and faint.35 For just as perfume, while always a delight to the smell, serves on occasion to counteract foul odours, so the thought of our blessings has in time of trouble a further, necessary, use: it is an antidote in the hands of those who do not shun the remembrance of happiness and do not insist on reproaching Fortune in everything. It ill becomes us to fall into this state by cavilling at our own life for receiving, 611 like a book, a single stain, while all the rest is clean and unspoiled. 9 For you have often heard that felicity depends on correct reasoning resulting in a stable habit, and that the changes due to fortune p599occasion no serious departure from it and do not bring with them a falling away that destroys the character of our lives.36 Mark the Rich: http://www.classicreader.com/book/995/3/Kisses from a distance: http://www.arabworldbooks.com/Literature/review14.htmFrom boots to iwo jima: a marine corpsman's story: http://www.alibris.com/booksearch?qsort=&page=1&matches=8&browse=1&qwork=7468439&full=1http://www.albert-einstein.org/.index9.htmlyamore: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WKrFtQ4ti2M&feature=relatedanother beautiful exploration of africa and oriental influences with salif keita (i turn the music off but you may enjoy it): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LXYgCf24z5M&feature=relatedThis one is like African bollywood, and it makes me want to go there and do something. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_eGAa-rfR_g&feature=related | | Sunday, April 19th, 2009 | | 10:44 am |
| | Saturday, April 18th, 2009 | | 11:27 am |
Even after hope is long gone faith remains.
An astonishing number of my female friends lately are having problems with something called 'cervical dysplasia' and 'cervical cancer.' It is a medical condition that has the potential to affect a woman's reproductive system or even her body (as cancers metasticize they develop further into other organs). Just like Lance Armstrong, in his book "It's not about the bike," I've been interested in the strength of some people's character to overcome the odds. Now whether a strict-Western approach is conceived, or another blend of alternative medicine, the fact remains that inside something is wrong. Inside the person a healing process needs to occur. All too frequently we forget about ourselves, to care for ourselves, and to be thankful for our good health when we have that. So among the stories I am hearing, underlies a strong commitment to some women to seek knowledge and ultimately survive. Note that men can also harbor or bear the malignant pathogens required to transmit cervical cancer in the event that it has been done so through a viral microorganism, but that is not the only source of growths and lesions indicating unhealthy tissues. What is the most significant thing you can do when you fall down? Get back up and move forward! How do you do that? With dignity and self-respect. So get out there and start reading, learning, and move on. I don't expect you to look into all of this stuff after suddenly reading my post. Haha, indeed. Rather, I am opening up some sites to track and follow cases where resourceful information may well be present. My own active interests are in seeing women, particularly of lower economic groups, refugees, those with poor medical care and unmotivated providers around the world to receive better information and screening. If I ever learn how to do this stuff, I would put my money into the investments of building simple hospitals in these places where there is nothing. And to offer free training to some. My realistic concerns have become warranted. When we have extremists trying to limit the advancement of our species (ie. you've read of them in pakistan killing doctors, removing females from school, and other methods of idiotic control) then we have a much more necessary war surrounding education and uprising from the ignorance that is being encouraged on such matters. There will someday be someone like me from a third-world country who wants to advance their skill and learn a trade that they will not abuse so they can help their neighbors and family. it is our duty to help. Have you ever considered why some of our recent politicians are such crooks? is it because they are not giving back from the same pot they stole from? chaney and the spoils of war through privatization of the war machine, mr chaney? It has always amazed me how many people can learn that there is something seriously wrong with their bodies and then go on living the same sort of lives, thinking that just because they are taking some drug (or getting acupuncture or using some herbs) everything is going to be better. I believed then - and still believe today - that we also must do something to change the environment from which our diseases form.http://www.circle-of-life.net/NaturalHealth.htmlwww.laf.org | | Sunday, April 12th, 2009 | | 12:15 pm |
One of Those People
I'm one of those people who will remain a bit in the dark for all of their lives. Just can't seem to formulate the correct equation for the solution I want in life. Sigh. So today went for a little fresh air, first time since the half-marathon about three weeks ago. That's not entirely true, I've run 1x each week about 3.5 miles totals. But I didn't really count those times because it's more of an attempt of trying not to fall entirely off the fitness bandwagon. Surprisingly, my heart rate remains relatively low but I'll continue to monitor it. That's a lot easier said than done, because often I just do not remember to track it. But right now I've started training again. I'm not entirely what for exactly, because there is a crossroads ahead in my life. I can go into a number of futures, but that's all up to a higher power now, SWT. So this morning I was looking for that awesome PT file I'd found from the BUD/S last year, but no luck. I'd managed then to find exactly the best routines. But in preparations a few weeks ago I managed to throw away almost all of those documents. Thing is, it's not about the documents, it's about the action. So this morning I managed to finally eat again. Only to realize it's been about 500 calories a day. No wonder my weight is dropping, I'm at 138 this morning. Problem is stress, it makes me anorexic. And right now I feel like there's no future, so I stop eating and 'conserve' vitals. After eating, went for a walk into the fresh air. It started as a run but I expected it to be part walk anyway, due to the needed nest of nurturing nature. That is I needed a break. So to my surprise I took a look at the weather and it reads '43 degrees Fahrenheit'! What!!!! It's bright, sunny, beautiful, spring, and cold. Yuck. That just means we have to wear more clothes when we go exercise outside. Well I'll probably head to the food store soon, there's some stuff I'd love to buy. But honestly, I'm still feeling the emotional drains of the past few weeks. I keep praying for a miracle, and if you're into it, say one for me. Life will always be the best option, even when it's a challenge that you would rather run from. Tail tuck? No, fight for it. Sword pointed away. Goal: Working on improving appetite. | | Friday, April 10th, 2009 | | 2:13 pm |
Words are but the shadows of reality.
The eye of the head was in conflict
With the eye of the heart.
The eye of the heart prevailed over the other
And displayed the proof.Someone said, 'Our master does not say a word.' 'It was a mental image of me that brought that man into my presence,' I said. 'But that image did not speak to him, asking 'How are things with you?' My mental image, that thought without words drew him here without the use of words. If the reality of my image draws him without words and brings him to another place, what is so strange in that?' Words are but the shadows of reality. They are only a branch of reality. And if the shadow alone can attract a man here, how much more the reality. Words are just the pretense. It is the element of sympathy that attracts one man to another, not just words. A man may see a thousand prophetic or saintly miracles, all of them caused by divine grace. But those phenomena would be of no value to him if there is no element of innate attraction connecting him with that prophet or saint. It is the sympathetic element which unsettles him. It keeps him agitated, seized by an inner restlessness. If there were no element of attraction for amber in a straw, the straw would never be attracted by amber. The attraction between them is hidden, not a visible thing. It is the mental image he creates that brings a man to the object of his desire. The image of the garden brings him to the garden, the thought of the shop brings him to the shop. But there is a secret deception hidden within these images. When you are filled with a desire for something, and you rush to a certain place with high expectations, you are filled with remorse when what you find disappoints you. You repent of having taken so much time and trouble. You say to yourself, I thought it would be better. It wasn't what I thought it would be! Those images can be like shrouds, and anything can hide within a shroud. When those mental images are dispelled and vanish, reality appears without the deceptive coverings of fanciful thoughts and attractive mental images. Then there is a re-awakening to truth and reality. When such is the case, there is no reason for regret or disappointment. When it is reality that draws you, there is nothing there other than reality. There is no reason for regret. It would be the same reality which drew you there in any form. What is this thing we are talking about? That which attracts is a single force, but it appears to be composed of many things. You can see how a man can be possessed by a hundred different desires. 'I want lamb,' he says. 'I want pastry, I want sweets. I want fritters, I want fruit and dates.' He goes through his lists and names them all one by one. But the heart of the matter is one single thing. The cause and origin of his desires is hunger, and that is only one desire. When a man has had his fill of one thing he says, 'None of those other things are necessary now. I don't need them any more.' It was not the ten or even the hundred he desired, or the thousand fancies that filled his mind, but only the one thing that motivated him-his hunger. The multiplicity of created beings is a trial sent by God. They say, 'This man is one' and 'they are a hundred.' They say the saint is one while mankind, they say, are many, a hundred or a thousand. But this is a great deception. The way of thinking that makes a man see mankind as many and the saint as one is a great misperception. Which hundred? Which fifty? Which sixty? A people lost and uncontrolled, without hands or feet, without mind or soul quiver like quicksilver or mercury in a magic talisman. Call them sixty if you like, or a hundred or a thousand, and yet you call the saint only one? Call them all nothing. And that one, that saint? He is a thousand and a hundred thousand and a thousand thousand. A king once gave a single soldier enough rations of bread for a hundred men. The other soldiers protested, but the kind said to himself, 'The day will come when I will reveal the truth, and they will know why I did this.' When the day of battle arrived they all fled from the field except for that one soldier. Only he stood and fought. 'There you are,' the kind said, 'It was for this reason that I did what I did.' A man must learn to strip his discriminative faculty of all prejudices and look to religion for instruction. Seek a friend in the faith. Faith consists in knowing who is one's truest friend. It is true religion that uncovers the only source of aid. If a man spends his whole life in the company of people who are undiscerning and lack discrimination, his own discriminative faculty will become feeble and weak. He will be unable to seek that friend or recognize the true faith. You cultivate this material physical existence in which there is no spiritual discrimination. Discrimination is that one vital quality which remains hidden and underdeveloped in man. A madman possesses hands and feet and waves them around pointlessly. And yet for all that mindless action he sadly lacks discrimination. Discrimination is that subtle essence of discernment within you. Yet by day and at night you are always occupied with indiscriminately nurturing your physical being. You labor under the false notion that you, the subtle concept of your soul and spirit, exist only through your physical nature. The truth is, it is really the other way around. That which is unseen is the master of the seen. How is it you have devoted all of your time and energy to caring for the needs of your physical body? How is it you have completely neglected the subtle essence, for it is the physical that exists through the subtle. The subtle is by no means dependent upon the physical for its existence. It is the physical which is the illusion. The inner light reveals itself through the windows of the eyes and ears. But even if those windows did not exist, it would nevertheless shine through by other means. Bring a lamp outside, hold it up in front of the sun and say, 'I see the sun because of this lamp.' Even if you did not bring the lamp, the sun would still be clearly visible. What need is there of a lamp? Your grief for what you’ve lost lifts a mirror
up to where you’re bravely working.
Expecting the worst, you look, and instead
here’s the joyful face you’ve been wanting to see.
Your hand opens and closes and opens and closes.
If it were always a fist or always stretched open,
you’d be paralyzed.
Your deepest presence is in every small contracting
and expanding,
the two as beautifully balanced and coordinated
as bird wings.§ § § § § § § § § § § § § § § § § § § § § § § § § § § § § § § § § § § § § § § § § § Yasmin was dancing in the solitude of her room, spinning to a lively Bangra and clinking her bangles together. The date seeds she was going to plant were soaking in water by the sunny window. It was spring and outside of the dungeon it was warm. She listened to birds singing as she walked the streets. She wanted to run, but wasn't too keen on the knee pains just yet. She had the call in her blood. Somewhere in the world far from her eyes, was a shining light calling out to the beloved. Aina, said the moon, unfold your tears and bring me your longing eyes... rest your soft hair upon the earth, and fasten your wet lashes together in the soliloquy of prayer. | | Friday, March 13th, 2009 | | 5:22 pm |
The Eyes Have It!
So I have this dark feeling that I'm one of those people who will have an interesting life. Alone. So be it. If I just accept it maybe things wouldn't be so difficult. This year has seen some real trials and tribulations and it's only what, March? For those of you wondering about what Selma's been up to, I haven't seen her all winter. That's usually a good thing. I've been running, and instead of tattooing myself anymore, if I'm going to do some sort of machoistic pain induction ceremonies I'd best start off with that Marathon next month. It sounds utterly stupid. But I'm not seeing any sense of everyday life anymore anyway. There's an updated photo from the two female siamese who I adopted last year. Through some form of higher power, call it government or God, I've been instructed to report to the Marines for a trip into Afghanistan. Right now I'm trying to decide whether I want to continue to be a pawn in the governmental power struggles and BS, or whether it is time to stand alone, live up to my radical ideas, and go out into the desert to leave civilization. You see, I've realized over the last year that it's going to be very difficult to ever attain the opportunities for those skills if I'm in the military and being their pawn for politics. It might be a good idea to complete SERE school before I leave. Or to get a degree and go teach. But either way, I think my real dreams are ended. It is now time to ease into a life of radical means and methods. There are still some things I want to accomplish. For example, having the confidence to punch a man in the face, knock out his teeth, break his nose, or fight a gang of men at once. To use a knife in a street fight, and to have the full confidence of self-reliance on such occasions. I've also decided that I could get a pack of dogs for self-defense. I'd need to train one of them, or several, though so that there would be no question when it came to self-defense. I want a dog with me for that. Men come and go, it seems to be the nature of the beast. I, too, will go. As for the rest of it, I don't want to be too premature. I'm thinking of traveling into the desert and totally away from civilization. One of the guys I used to live with, briefly, he went off into Cambodia and I'm not sure if it's permanent, but he does alright. I don't really feel talented enough to sustain myself, but maybe I can. As a teacher, God knows, maybe as someone's servant. I've never felt I had the attitude that I could do something like this before, yet now it grows stronger each day as I imagine the failure of every piece of my life becoming the stones on a path to numbness, maybe joy, maybe nothing resembling what we feel in this western world of plenty. It sounds so dramatic, certainly. But you haven't any comprehension of the depths to which some souls sink. Do you know I feel more and more empathy with crazy old Ezra? As I get older. In less than half a century I'll be 40. And what will I have done with this life?! In order to retire and live off of that measly pension, I'd have to serve another 15 years. I'm not sure I can stand the heartaches of it. And I'm not getting what I want from it: the physical training and toughness of a warrior. Yes, some discipline, no not operational or other desired capabilities. This weekend I'm off on a spiritual quest. It's going to be challenging, and it involves some fasting and some physical challenges. Instead of going to the beaches, which I would enjoy tremendously, I am going to a shrine. No one knows of the consequences, and almost no one even cares. But when one day I am dying and I will be asked did I regret something, I never ever want to die saying that I did NOT fight for what was righteous, sacred, significant, humane, compassionate, or deserved. I am a fighter, and no one can ever take that from my heart, no matter who they are. To the last drop. Upon my return I have 8 days of 'work' left. I will be preparing for this journey because most likely, my heart will never return from this journey. I expect to leave of piece of it far away in the land of death. It has long been since those two years I left my heart's death in the Gagada Desert of Africa. One day in the not too distant future, again will I travel into the desert, and this time I want it to consume me, for the love that can never be consumed in this life. And when I go, I will leave no trace. And I will not write to you, nor take you any pictures, nor will we likely meet ever again to follow that. I'm not the type of girl who wants to hang onto superficial things. Right now I'm destroying the old selves, retiring possessions that cannot be used as tools in this life or the next. And I am saying goodbye to those who burden my mind or spirit. I'll not be denied of the path in life drawing me onwards. It was never meant to be a rainy day in my heart, because in the dust it was written, the name of the one I love. And after the wind storms, the dust that has blown away reveals again the name, etched like a tattoo, upon my heart, scabbed over 1000 times, and carved again 1001 more. Next weekend, if I run that marathon, it will hurt. It will hurt and every moment of pain I will remember the death of my heart, of your loyalty, of your failing emotions upon the ground at my feet, of your death and that of your brother, of your fears, and your inability to deal with life when it comes at you in full force. And you would excuse your pain with tears and words, when someone should have slapped you and pushed you through the fire, into the pit, to fight, with gritted teeth and a gleam in your raging eyes. When I run it, I will wear the bib. The photo may appear. Or it may not. Right now it seems to matter little, but at the end it will mean all the world.  Current Music: My Mind is Silent at this Time | | Saturday, February 28th, 2009 | | 8:58 pm |
The Traveler
The dream has ended, and the door shut to unknown eyes. This time the traveler bore but two pieces of luggage, and in her heart the symbol of recognition. None asked that birthright, but it was always given. Like the fuel for a starving scavenger, the traveler waylaid by the weakness of Fate, has again become the lone survivor in a battle of emptiness. How long had they known, how long had she actually cared? And in the timing, the racing, and the fierceness of the raptor's gaze, again she found faith in it all. What of the journey if it has no ending? The child asked her, with the purest innocence of one who would remain sheltered for eternity. Would no one then die? Could the immortal and goodness that pervades change actually be identified, harnessed, and put to a more synergistic ultimatum? Chuckling, it became again the mind of a hag, cackling ferociously and slipping between the images; reality for one moment of the old woman and another moment she was a cat, and no one was wiser. In the dream world, transitions never come, the sadness never creeps into her eyes, and a smile gently warms the breath of his inner child over and over again. A thousand times the grass grows wet with dew from your morning breath, and a thousand times you wake into your lover's warm arms. Death holds no dominion here, nor do your rules and pettiness. When you walk with the eagle upon your shoulder, there is only one who knows yet the hour and dominion over your grave. Softly, gently, you have closed that doorway, tightly, and it was then that the dream did end. And I have wanted you like nothing in life before this very moment of knowing you, O Sanam. My heart, the fragile piece of glass in your hand that, when dropped, it will shatter into such tiny shards, impossible to repair. A Perfect One was traveling through the desert. He was stretched out around the fire one night Ad said to one of his close ones, "There is a slave loose not far from us. He escaped today from a cruel master. His hands are still bound behind his back, His feet are also shackled. I can see him right now praying for God's help. Go to him. Ride to that distant hill; About a hundred feet up and to the right You will find a small cave. He is there. Do not say a single word to him. Bring the man to me. God requests that I personally untie his body And press my lips to his wounds." The disciple mounts his horse and within two hours Arrives at the small mountain cave. The slave sees him coming, the slave looks frightened. The disciple, on orders not to speak, Gestures toward the sky, pantomiming: God saw you in prayer, Please come with me, A great Mushid (Teacher) has used his heart's divine eyes To know your whereabouts. The slave cannot believe this story, And begins to shout at the man and tries to run. But trips from his bindings. The disciple becomes forced to subdue him. Think of this picture as they now travel: The million candles in the sky are lit and singing. Every particle of existence is a dancing alter That some mysterious force worships. The earth is a church floor whereupon In the middle of a glorious night Walks a slave, weeping, tied to a rope behind a horse, With a speechless rider Taking him toward the unknown. Several times with all of his might the slave Tries to break free, Feeling he is being returned to captivity. The rider stops, dismounts-brings his eyes Near the prisoner's eyes. A deep kindness there communicates an unbelievable hope The rider motions-soon, soon you will be free. Tears roll down from the rider's cheeks In happiness for this man. Anger, all the fighting and tormenting want, Mashuq (Sweetheart), God has seen you and sent a close one. Mashuq (Sweetheart), God has seen your heart in prayer And has sent Hafiz. | | Saturday, January 17th, 2009 | | 2:11 pm |
| | Wednesday, January 14th, 2009 | | 9:44 pm |
On The World
It's beguiling, the trick is to tame the heart. Heart Rate: 38. Weird, but I think somehow meditating has something to do with this. Got some stories but no time to bring them up. reading the quran. spending a lot of time with people for once in my life. pretty good stuff. back to it. | | Thursday, September 18th, 2008 | | 6:20 pm |
Funny How Life Works Out
I feel as Eros must have felt when he met Psyche, at the moment when he knew that he would have to keep her in the dark.  Current Mood:  loved | | Sunday, June 22nd, 2008 | | 9:17 am |
Wellness is the key to a long and healthy life.
Wellness is the key to a long and healthy life. Many people have the wrong perception of it. Wellness is from the neck up, and fitness from the neck down. Too many people work out every day, but go around with the worst attitudes, which just wastes all their physical efforts." Reader's comment sent in to Bob Welch, columnist for The Register-Guard, Eugene, Oregon (2/5/04) Today I ran 1 mile around the 8:30 pace. It was actually slower. My body does not like to cooperate mornings anymore; this is a large mystery to me. It could have been all that food I ate yesterday. So the theory of performance nutrition is that you eat to replace the calories and of course a basic sustenance level each day. I have no idea how much I need for the basic, and because my activity is generally 1-4 hours every day, I just will eat whenever I can, and as healthy as I can. The trick to performance nutrition is to have a better plan, than I do. The key is to understand and follow some basic patterns for your workouts. I fail to do that, miserably. I'm still thinking too "free" when it comes to making a workout plan. It is obvious in the performance, and I'd like to see this change. I think, too, that my body is a bit weak, in its cravings because like yesterday I craved tremendous amounts of proteins (black beans, cheese, tuna, onions) and salt. Then a while later it craved carbs (bagels, which also contain protein) and fat ('butter' which may also have some protein). And yogurt. I'm sort of hoping that that was building muscles. And maybe that retarded the performance a bit. Not quite clear, and definitely over analyzed. I wonder if I should take another look at the Chris Carmicheal book that was recommended by Armstrong a few years ago on nutrition. Also reading the SW website and SS. But their stuff includes more meat than I could ever imagine forcing myself to eat. I just don't like proteins of the regular varieties and must frequently obtain it from alternative sources, cheese, fish, beans, grains, legumes, and dairy. That's the earliest workout today. And I had to sleep when I returned, for about 3 hours I knocked out. My cats probably think I'm some weird alien.. but hey! That's what I think of them! Too bad I'm not an artist who could make that into a cool cartoon, maybe Larsen style. | | Saturday, June 21st, 2008 | | 6:28 am |
Oregon Leads the Way, Education Schmeducation?
http://ap.google.com/article/ALeqM5hnyGTwDu8k8xBCzybhXHEbUvGrrAD91EAU900http://www.nwrel.org/nwedu/2001fall/oregon.html2008 Political Courage test, haha! http://www.votesmart.org/pdf/2008/2008_OR_SL_Political_Courage_Test_Final.pdfA curious fellow died one day and found himself in limbo waiting in a long, long line for judgment. As he stood there, he noticed that some souls were allowed to march right through the gates of heaven. Others were led over to Satan, who threw them into a lake of fire. Every so often, instead of hurling a poor soul into the fire, Satan would toss him or her to one side. After watching Satan do this several times, the fellow's curiosity got the better of him. He strolled over and tapped Old Nick on the shoulder. "Excuse me, there, Your Darkness," he said. "I'm waiting in line for judgment, and I couldn't help wondering why you are tossing some people aside instead of flinging them into the fires of hell with the others?" "Ah," Satan said with a grin. "Those are Portlanders. I'm letting them dry out so they'll burn." ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------------- he doctor said there was no way to immediately tell what triggered McQueeney's attack, but said it could have been a mixture of factors. Perhaps a predisposition to heart problems was exasperated by prolonged heart exertion, dehydration or a lack on electrolytes, he said. Terry was quick to point out that running shouldn't be looked to as the primary factor. http://media.barometer.orst.edu/media/storage/paper854/news/2003/04/28/News/Runner.Dies.After.Ultramarathon-2295913.shtmlOh yeah, and what do runners want for their birthday? | | Saturday, June 14th, 2008 | | 1:49 pm |
| | Monday, June 9th, 2008 | | 8:35 pm |
Another One Eats the Dark Dust of Ereshkigal
http://www.ivu.org/congress/euro95/athletic.htmlVegetarian Nutrition, Physical Activity and Athletic Performance by Marcel Hebbelinck, Ph.D., F.A.C.S.M., Professor, Free University of Brussels. from EVU News, Issue 2 / 1996 Why is the human diet such an active field of inquiry with respect to physical performance? The most obvious reason is that physical activity in general, and athletic performance in particular, is so dependent on the quality and quantity of food intake. Given the factors of phylogenetic heritage (i.e., apes are vegetarians), the vegetarian diet is most probably the oldest form of nutrition of all early hominids (Gordon 1987). Furthermore, it is a reasonable assumption that seeds, nuts, fruits roots and other plant foods have continued to contribute a major portion of diet of pre-historic people in most tropical and temperate regions. The spectrum of modern human diets show a remarkable range of ways of feeding, from the high fish and meat diets of the Eskimo to the strict vegetarian diets of some groups of the Indian subcontinent, with every possible combination in-between. Vegetarian diets themselves clearly can vary greatly and the definition of various types of vegetarian regimens can be distinguished: Frutarian: diet consisting of raw or dried fruits, nuts, seeds, vegetable oil and sometimes honey. Vegan or strict (pure) vegetarian: all-vegetable and fruit diet, without any product of animal origin. Lacto vegetarian: all-vegetable and fruit diet, and dairy products. Lacto-ovo vegetarian: all-vegetable and fruit diet, supplements with dairy products and eggs. The reason to voluntarily restrict or avoid animal products is mainly ethical philosophical, religious, cultural and/or health-related. Moreover, today most of the worlds people, particularly in the third world countries, live on vegetarian or almost vegetarian diets, because they cannot afford animal products, and plant foods, nuts seeds and fruits are all they have available. Some of these populations however, living on a frugal diet, show a remarkable level of physical activity and performance capacity. These often long lived societies undoubtedly exemplify many of the principles gerontologists have discovered over decades. Let us look at some aspects of their living style. For instance, the Tarahumara Indians organise ultra long distance runs, in which teams are competing for a ball which they kick forward on mountain paths; they run continuously for 24 to 48 hours achieving 150 to 300 km. The Tarahumara-Indians main nutrition is maize, beans and pumpkin, wild plants and some sweet water fish. Meat is only eaten occasionally at special ceremonies. Another example is based on observations made in 1970 by Sula Benet, a professor of anthropology, who reported on her visit to Abkhasia: Not long ago, in the village of Tanush in the Soviet Republic of Abkasia, I raised my glass of wine to toast a man who looked no more than 70. May you live as long as Moses (120 years), I said. He was not pleased. He was 119. With regard to health and fitness Dr. Benet observed that they usually are blessed with good eyesight, and most have their own teeth; their posture is unusually erect, even into advanced age; many of the 70 and older take walks of several miles a day swim in mountain streams. Studies led by Soviet and foreign investigators show that, in general signs of arteriosclerosis, when they occurred at all, were found only in extreme old age. There were no reported cases of either mental illness or cancer in a nine-year study of 123 Abkhasians over 100 years old. Overeating is considered dangerous in Abkhasia, and fat people are regarded as ill. The Abkhasion diet contains very little meat perhaps once or twice a week. At all three meals they eat abista, a corn meal mash cooked in water without salt, which takes the place of bread. Abista is eaten warm with pieces of home-made goat cheese tucked into it. They also consume two glasses of buttermilk a day. The other staples in the Abkhasion daily diet include fresh fruits, especially grapes, fresh vegetables, including onions, tomatoes, cucumbers and cabbage, a wide variety of pickled vegetables, and lima beans, cooked slowly for hours, mashed and served with a sauce of onions, peppers, garlic, pomegranate juice and pepper. Large quantities of garlic are always at hand. They drink neither coffee, nor tea, but they consume in small quantities a locally produced, dry red wine of low alcoholic content. Absent from their diet is sugar, though honey, a local product, is used. Another anthropologist who describes the values of a frugal diet and an active lifestyle as studied in long lived people of the Caucasus (Abkhasians), the Karakorum Range (Hunzas) and the Andes (Vilkabamba) is Alexander Leaf, a professor of clinical medicine at Harvard Medical School who says in his book entitled Youth in Old Age (Leaf, 1975): Most important, good dietary habits should be established in early life...and endurance exercises are most beneficial... If I can offer you no guaranteed formula of my own of how to obtain a long, vigorous healthy life, let me at least share with you the clue I received from Markhti Targil, age 104, of Duripshi in Abkhasia. Markhti told me that every morning as long as he can remember he walks down the steep hill to bath in the icy waters of a rapid mountain stream. After dressing he climbs back up the hill to his house. Surely any day Markhti can do that he must be too fit to die. In a survey of the long living Hunza, Pakistani nutritionist Dr. Magsood Ali found that their almost vegetarian diet had a very low caloric intake of 1923 Calories with 50 grams of protein, 36 grams of fat and 354 grams of carbohydrate, meat and dairy products constituting only 1,5 percent of the total (cited in: Leaf, 1975). Similar figures have been reported by Dr. Guillermo Vela of Quito, who found a striking low caloric consumption also among the elderly of Vilcabamba. The average daily diet provided 1200 calories, with 35 grams of protein, 12 to 19 grams of fat and 200 to 260 grams of carbohydrates. Protein and fat were largely of vegetable origin. The diet of the Hunzas is mainly grain (wheat, barley and buckwheat), jobs tears and small seeds. Green vegetables (eg spinach and lettuce), root vegetables (eg carrots, turnips, potatoes, radishes) are eaten. Beans, chickpeas and other pulses such as lentils and sprouted pulses are part of their diet: they also eat marrows and pumpkins, as well as plenty of cottage cheese; their fruits are mainly wild apricots and berries, eaten fresh or sun-dried. Meat is eaten only on rare occasions. Semi or almost vegetarians on a scant diet, all of the above mentioned long lived people (Abkhasians, Hunza and Vilcabamba) share a common feature in their lifestyles, i.e. a great deal of physical activity. The traditional farming and household practices demand heavy work and all are involved from early childhood to terminal days. Superimposed on the physical labour involved in farming is the mountainous terrain. Simply transversing the hills on foot during the days activities sustains a high degree of cardio-vascular fitness as well as muscular strength. What do we learn from these studies of these three high altitude cultures of long living populations with regard to diet and physical activity? They have in common a frugal semi-vegetarian diet, low in calories, and closely linked to the soil, from which most of the food they eat is taken directly without much refinement, low in fat and proteins mainly from plant origin. Another powerful contributory factor to the health and fitness of these people is undoubtedly the daily habitual physical activity, which consists mainly of walking, hiking, household and farming activities. Dr. David Davies, a human ecologist at the Gerontological Unit of the University College in London, who has studied the population living in the Vilcabamba region (in the Ecuadorean Andes between 1520 and 1700 metres above sea level), writes that if the centenarians of the Andes had been found twenty years ago, they would by now have been exploited out of existence. For the world was not ready to receive them then, and there was not sufficient interest, as there is today, for their reception into the world of science. The general consciousness and knowledge of people today is such that we now accept vegetarianism at least as a normal possibility for a diet. (Davis, 1975, p.66) Recent surveys (Slavin, et al,. 1986, Mickenberger, 1989) show, that an increasing number of athletes are adopting vegetarian or semi-vegetarian diets, reducing their intake of meat, and/or increasing their consumption of vegetables, fruits, nuts, seeds and whole grain foods. A remarkable example of an impressive athletic achievement is the so-called Deutschland Lauf (endurance-run through Germany). This long distance run covers 1000 km (about 650 miles) from the Baltic to the Alps and is organized by the department of Sports Medicine and Health Education of the Johannes Gutenberg University in Mainz under the direction of professor Jung. A first pilot study (trial run of 1100km in 19 days) took place in 1981 and was then definitively organised in 1987 with about 150 participants, males and females between 20 and 70 years of age. The participants of this ultralong distance run, taking lacto vegetarian wholefood meals with a lot of fresh fruits and raw vegetables; medical examinations and scientific evaluation showed that this vegetarian diet was adequate in calories, vitamins and minerals. Very often it is said that a vegetarian diet is quite suited for endurance athletes (eg Nyboer, well known Dutch Marathon runner, champion of the seventies), but is less adequate for activities requiring great muscular strength and speed. This belief is contradicted by striking examples of vegetarian top-level performers in athletic events where strength and/or speed is predominant: Peter Hussing (Germany), 1979, European amateur boxing champion, superheavy weight class Andreas Cahling (Sweden), 1980, Mr. International Body Building Toni Innauer (Austria), 1980, Olympic Gold Medalist Ski Jump Ingra Manecke (Germany), German champion discus throwing from 1977 until 1982 Chris Evert (USA), World class tennis champion in the eighties Martina Navratilova (USA) , World class tennis champion Dave Scott recognized as greatest triathlete in the world, won 4 times the legendary Haways Ironman Triathlon Edwin Moses (USA), World Record Holder, Olympic Champion, 400m hurdles, went eight years without losing a race An excellent example of a great champion in swimming is Murray Rose (Australia), 3 gold medals and one world record at the 1956 Olympic Games in Melbourne, and subsequently 1 gold, 1 silver medal, and 1 world record at the 1960 Olympic Games in Rome. Murray Rose was a third generation lacto vegetarian. In an interview, he said that he was raised in a vegetarian family and that he never had eaten meat, fish or any food derived from killed animals. He said, that he was not just abstaining from meat, fish or fowl, but that he believed in a natural wholefood nutrition, such as vegetables, fruit, unrefined rice and wheat products, honey, high quality dairy and soja products, nuts, sesame, millet and sunflower seeds (ref. in Stolzenberg,1974). In most textbooks on nutrition and athletic performance, general statements are made which can also be observed in a vegetarian diet. Calories (nowadays expressed in kilojoules; 1 calorie = 4.18 kilojoules). An athlete may require up to more than 6000 calories daily, depending on age, sex, body size, physical condition, type of sport, climate, duration and intensity of the activity. While a nutritious diet includes sources of carbohydrate, protein and fat (=macronutrients), carbohydrate is considered the best source to meet high energy demands. Carbohydrate Carbohydrate, in the form of blood glucose, liver and muscle glycogen, provides energy for both short intensive efforts and endurance events. When glycogen is used up, the athlete may become exhausted. About 55 percent of the total dietary energy should come from carbohydrate. What carbohydrates should be recommended? Complex carbohydrates have an advantage over simple carbohydrates (= all refined sugars) because they are more nutrient. Nutrient dense foods have a high ratio of vitamins and minerals in relation to energy content. They contain more B-vitamins necessary for metabolism, and more fiber and iron, contribution to a nutritionally balanced diet. High carbohydrate meals help to minimise the depletion of muscle glycogen and subsequent feelings of fatigue that occur after heavy training. Whole grain foods (pastas and cereals) are rich in carbohydrates, but also fresh sweet fruits and sun-dried fruits will provide a healthy source of energy. The latter foodstuffs are to be preferred because they will help to restore the acid/base balance of the blood. Protein About 10-15 percent of the daily energy content should come from protein food. The R.D.A. (Recommended Daily Allowance) differs in the literature from as low as 0.5g/kg body weight daily to 1g/kg b.w. and well above for athletes engaging in high intensity and long exercise. Many athletes, especially strength athletes, regularly consume quantities of protein far in excess of the RDA. Apparently they believe this practise is beneficial to their performance, and may increase muscle size and strength. On the contrary, high protein intake beyond caloric requirements will only be stored as fat and excessive amounts may result in ill effects including loss of calcium (hyper calcurial), gout, and dehydration. Highly active individuals may need more protein than sedentary people, but the safety margin built into the RDA of 0.8g/kg body weight can adequately compensate for the athletes needs, provided he/she follows a balanced diet. Amino acids are the major constitutuents of proteins. In total, 20 different amino acids can be found in proteins but not every protein contains all 20 and, in addition, the relative proportions of each amino acid may vary widely in different proteins. Of these 20 amino acids, only 11 or perhaps 12 can be produced in the body. The remaining amino acids are called essential or indispensable because they must be obtained via food intake. Plant proteins are mostly not so complete because they lack one or more of the nutritionally essential amino acids. Nevertheless, certain vegetables, such as soy, are quite adequate with regard to essential amino acids. To overcome the limitation in quality of protein it is also recommended to complement certain vegetable proteins with others so as to improve the amino acid profile. Examples of complementary combinations of vegetable proteins are: Legumes/grains (eg - lentil soup and whole wheat bread, refried beans and brown rice) Legumes/seeds (eg sprouted soybeans and sunflower seeds, chickpeas and sesame seeds) Legumes/nuts (eg peas and cashew nuts) This way, the vegetarian and vegan athlete should be able to meet protein needs if the diet contains sufficient calories and a variety of fruits, nuts, seeds and vegetables are consumed. Fat Fats are a concentrated source of energy, but they require more oxygen to metabolise than carbohydrates and are therefore less desirable fuel suppliers for physical performance. Training can increase the bodys ability to use fat for energy. About 30% or less of the daily energy content may come from fat. It should not be forgotten that much of our daily diet contains a variety of fat and that preference should be given to polyunsaturated fats, which are mainly found in non-hydrogenated and non-emulgated plant oils (eg sunflower seed, soy, sesame). In our modern society the RDA of 30% of caloric intake is frequently exceeded and this high fat diet may be associated with increased risk of heart disease. Vitamins and minerals Vitamins and minerals are important for nutrient and oxidative metabolism and therefore indispensable for athletic performance. A selection from a wide variety of whole food products remains the best advice for obtaining the many different vitamins and minerals needed. There are some questions about possible marginal iron deficiency impairing athletic performance by reducing the oxygen-carrying capacity of blood and certain metabolic functions related to the production of energy. Iron needs appear to be higher in athletes, especially in female endurance athletes, and therefore need for a supplemental source of iron may be advisable (e.g. green leaf-vegetables, soy beans and soy-derived products, potatoes, dried fruits, pumpkin seeds, whole wheat bread, nuts). Nutritional supplements and nutrition fads In the pursuit of improving athletic ability, many athletes, coaches and trainers often fall prey to nutrition fads. Use of extra vitamins, minerals, amino acids, plant extracts, and other special products available to athletes, has no scientific basis for their efficacy. Energisers, Glycogen replacers, Amino stack, Anabolic revitilisers and others may lure uninformed athletes and coaches to purchase these products, often at outrageous costs. Aronson (1986) has scrutinised some of the most used supplements and found that very few, if any, of these products had a true nutritional value. Furthermore, some athletes take excessive amounts of these products believing that it may thus enhance their performance accordingly, when in fact they may be harmful to both health and performance. The types of supplement and so-called ergogenetic aids for athletes are continually changing. Most often, these products are marketed without any substantiated scientific research indicating the potential benefits or possible harmful side effects. Large doses of vitamins and minerals in excess of RDA do not improve performance; they even may be harmful. For instance, excess iron intake can decrease zinc absorption (Zinc plays an important role in human growth, it is component of insulin and is involved in many enzymatic processes). Because iron supplementation has been widely advocated as being of potential value to athletes, it is possible that some athletes are oversupplementing themselves with iron and thus compromising their zinc status. Most of the commercial supplements and so-called ergogenetic aids do not benefit the athlete who keeps to a rational training program and a well balanced diet. A good diet, and a vegetarian regimen may certainly do, can make a difference at the finish line. The basis of a high-performance diet is a variety of healthy natural foods, not supplements. In conclusion, from the many observations of physically active people of all kinds it is beyond doubt that vegetarian eating styles can adequately meet athletes nutritional needs and can successfully support vigorous training programs. Prof. Dr.h.c. Marcel Hebbelinck, 10 Merelaan , B-1150 Bruxelles, Tel. +32-267 38 437 References ARONSON. (1986), Protein and miscellaneous ergogenetic aids. Physician & Sp. Med., 14 (5), 199-202. BENET, s., (1971), Why they live to be 100, or even older, in Abkhasia. The New York Times Magazin, 1971, Dec 26. Benet, S., (1974), Abkhasians : The long-living people of the Caucasus (Case studies in cultural anthropology). New York : Holt, Rinehart & Winston. BUTTERFIELD, G:E:, (1987), Whole-body protein utilization in humans. Med.Sci. Sports Ex., 19, 5 (Suppl.), p 157-165. DAVIES, D., (1975), The centanaries of the Andes. London: Barrie and Jenkinds Ltd. GORDON, K., (1987), Evolutionary perspectives on human diet. In: Johnston, F.E., (ed), Nutritional anthropology. New York: Mcgraw-Hill. MICKENBERGER, V., (1989), Vegetarier im Hochleistungssport (Vegetarians and excellence in sport), Thesis, Institute of Sports Medicine, Goethe Universität, Frankfurt. SLAVIN, J.L., McNAMARA, E.A., LUTTER,J.M.(1986), Nutritional practices of woman cyclists, including recreational riders and elite racers. In: Katch, F.I. (ed.), Sport, Health and Nutrition. Champaign, III.:Human Kinetics Publ., Inc., p 107-110. STOLZENBERG, G., (1974), Hochleistung durch Ganzheitsernährung, Heidenheim (Brenz): Heidenheimer Verlagsanstalt. Current Music: intunewithspirit.com | | Monday, May 26th, 2008 | | 6:18 pm |
Finish It
One of the most beautiful movies ever made is called "The Fountain." Not only is it based on a premise that love surpasses death and time eternal, there are some excellent actors, actresses, and the theory that some mistakes we make cannot be repaired. Lately I rethink the idea of bonds. Such things must be perfectly mutual. As for the rest, I cannot yet judge. Busy working out a lot. Currently getting busy with some upper body. Improvement with the swim. New Camera lenses. Silence is so sweet. | | Monday, May 5th, 2008 | | 6:54 pm |
Selma
Whew!! You'll never guess who I saw out on the road today?! Not Henry Rollins (I wish!!) Not John. It was Selma!! She looks like she may be losing weight but she insisted there's still a lot of fat on her body. Today I took off on a hilly path because we're doing the Dreaded druid 10k at the end of June and that's a lot more miles than I've done in months. I'm losing conditioning and my pride keeps me from starting small. The truth is you gotta run as much as you can because naturally your body will improve. So today I had to justify my desire for some chocolate cake and ice cream. Imagine my surprise when about halfway through the workout a blackhaired lady with red shorts pulls up beside me in the run! (This was after I encouraged 3 cyclists and 2 runners up a hill in the park.) She looks very tan and healthy, but she's never satisfied with herself. Who she is. She is constantly changing. She said her work is stressing her out because every day here, despite her independence, she grows sadder as her heart yearns for the impossible. She says she has told it now to stop harrassing her happiness, but the wounded heart never listens. It seeks what it wants, and it doesn't listen to convention or rules. The absolute truth is in my face, she said, and she found herself a fool to continue to seek a dream. I don't know why she is so stubborn about it, nor so narcisstic. "Today," she said, "I went walking in his neighborhood. I willed him to pop out of the walls where I work so that I could take my chances and punch him, because I know it wouldn't hurt. I want to write to him and tell him that he was right, and that I am only sad because he is right that he never cared for me. And I want to punch him because I think he knew all along. Because I wanted to be right and I challenged everything I believed to try and make the fucking impossible work." She got kind of emotional, but luckily it's allergy season so her snot and tears blended in with about half the other runners I saw out there. "He do not deserve my memories. This man does not deserve my body longing for his and my mind longing for his. And I was a fool to jump into it, desperate for a beautiful man. And for all his words, as real as they might have seemed, they were but an illusion because he was unable to understand his own mind. But I was an adult too wasn't I?" It was obvious that she wanted to cry. How do people deal with these things? | | Saturday, May 3rd, 2008 | | 8:08 pm |
Where the Sun is Lost
To the sound of falling rain, a heart breaks from the grain. Lacking sustenance upon the years, her ability to foster, abandoned by the unnurtured hand, the cannibal heart this time, the silent shadowy eyes, dying where the sun is lost. Darkness days turned out the sun and it seems you are not the only one to lose your way and die of thirsting. fasten those eyes and hold on too slow ensure that the night still has somewhere left to go. And in the blood rain, and in the dark godless hearts walk in here a ruined memorial, burnt embers glitter And her heart remains bitter living where the sun is lost. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GqIHVJX8HRU Current Mood: The Past | | Friday, May 2nd, 2008 | | 9:37 pm |
And the gorilla is for sand racing...
Well some unexpected events taking place. Workout: 1.5 miles run, tons of abs, and some walking. I don't feel very elite right now. In fact, like a bloated pig. Perhaps even boiled. I've got to sit down less and sleep a bit less, too. My body just dehydrated itself and tried to get heat stroke today. But that half naked guy in black shorts, running ahead of me was worth the view... if no one ever told you, I started running because the hottest guy I knew was a runner. Since then, of course, I've matured greatly. Joe was talking about how we'll have to start swimming at the P. I heard they have a suspended track, which sounds really cool. But I'll see if I actually have time for that stuff. I think people greatly underestimate the significance of a highly athletic troop. It just bumps the morale and productivity through the roof. Screw that soft-stuff they're promoting about "destress rooms". I want my PT, nothing else. Let me get my aggression out in some sweat and I'll be good. Form a comradie with the people I'm fighting, and we'll no longer carve out each others' guts with blunt spoons. We'll find something much better to do, destructive, or otherwise. Probably positive. Oh and the weather here is beautiful. But it is for some reason affecting my breathing a bit. I wonder if that is a thick air, effect. Like particulate matter. Anyway. New training partner. He's 11 years younger than me. Damn I start to feel like an Old Farty Grannie. YIKES! However, I'm gonna put my trust in this whippersnapper. If anyone can help me, it's gonna be a highly motivated individual at this place. Because lord knows they're mostly soft fatties. And complacency has never been my style. Will jump in next week, regardless of whether I am ready, Pheonix. | | Saturday, April 19th, 2008 | | 11:32 am |
Liquid Silver
In life we determine our path. Did Intuition ever guide your path when your eyes were blinded? What of the lady called to as Ambition? And when at night you do not sleep because of the feeling that you are not living your dream. It is time to let Reality join the Journey Muse. "The many-voiced song of the river echoed softly. Siddhartha looked into the river and saw many pictures in the flowing water. The river's voice was sorrowful. It sang with yearning and sadness, flowing towards its goal ... Siddhartha was now listening intently...to this song of a thousand voices ... then the great song of a thousand voices consisted of one word: Om -- Perfection ... From that hour Siddhartha ceased to fight against his destiny." This is a book that changed my life. It was required reading in 1993 when I attended senior high school. These days I do not listen as well, but once you recognize your path, it is your duty to heed the call. Step up and fulfill your potential. Prepare yourself as the warrior prepares for his battle. Pain and suffering are universal. It is your mission to overcome hurdles. Yesterday's workout has left me a sack of potatoes. 0630: Run 1.5 miles in 13:00 even (tired legs) Crunches 98 in 2 minutes Push-ups 40 in 2 minutes (poor form) 1400: Walked leisurely 2 miles 1530: Squats (15r, 2s; wt: barbell only) Lying leg press (15r, 2s; wt: 45#) Leg extensions (15r, 2s; wt: 90#) oppsite of Leg Extensions (15r, 2s, 40#) "Incline" single-leg lunges (10r, 2s; wt: supported barbell) Calve raises (15r, 2s; 180#!) Pullups with assist x4 Dumbell Chest Flies (15r,3x, 15#) Dumbells Chest raises?! (15r, 3x, 20#) Abs: nice 15 minutes of workout Notes: The Inclined lunges made me sweat. They're a good exercise. I'm not as sore as I thought I'd be... yet. Paulo's got Tino on a beginner workout, so I think that's why I'm not as sore. But I will be if we ever get more serious. Note that it's not too much to add this beginner workout alongside of what exercise I already do. And I think adding swimming is a superb idea. Will look into a few more ideas for a training routine, and set up the schedule also for training for the Marine Corps Marathon. Lots to think about and do, but I am very incredibly thankful to have such supportive friends and colleagues. Coincidentally we're all FMFers who enjoy being operational. Maybe that's the tie that binds. I am looking now for a swimming coach or training buddy that has the time to devote. Since I no longer have a cat, and I've allowed people to contact me who want to, I will not continue pushing too many people who are not already willing to workout on their own. I mean the WOMAN Challenge group will continue, but I will not encourage these ladies beyond their own limits. I need to focus on myself, but also continue to develop my weaknesses. Like last week Ronie approached me with the relational story regarding my tattoo. He is really a good guy, looks like he's here until Sept. time frame before he leaves for... I think he said Sig. Anyway here's his story. Two of my colleagues appreciate my energy and know of my strengths. But I still lack the ability to develop others. And this is my challenge, my weakness. To train others, to trust them, and to entrust responsibility to them in order to fulfill a project or product. That is I'm a bit micromanaging, or rather, I just don't give anything out. And that hurts me because my seeming indifference makes them believe that I'm an uncompromising bitch. Which is not at all the case. So Ronie told me to look at my tattoo. It is not regulated. I chose to get it done there. Why? Why am I the way I am? If I am strong, why am I such an individual? There is no "I" in "Team." These kind of talks with him frustrate me because even though I disagree, I believe that there is something important to what he is saying. I don't believe that ideals are meant to be fully achieved. If you see the big picture, then you can accept the challenge of a hurdle. But I don't want to make room for hurdles. And that is again my weakness, my challenge. When I fail, I fall down, and hide the weakness. This will not help me to grow, nor will it allow me to become a team member. It sounds kind of strange when I write it, because it seems vague. I think a child would be confused as to what I am saying here. When one of my teachers said that I am a superwoman, he said that this is known. But since it is understood that even a superhero has a vulnerability, then I must accept the challenge of seeing beyond judgement. My strength is like the tattoo that I have: it is highly visible. People see it and acknowledge that this is what I am. Most people think it is interesting and want to know more. But here is where my weakness comes into play. Because I would ignore the weaker members of the team and only acknowledge the strong. Of course, Ronie does not see everything that goes on in my life. He does not pretend to, and does not want to. We have come into an agreement that respect is also allowing differences of opinions and following specific rules or facing unpleasant circumstances. There are things that have to be done, and some procedures require specific protocols. Well I need to learn to pick up the weak and allow my pride to suffer, my strength to motivate, and to lead individual failure into a team success. We both agree in humanitarian efforts to improve the world and respect individuality. I think I will call Marie soon. | | Sunday, April 13th, 2008 | | 5:38 pm |
Wow, what a weekend! Saturday I went walking into the city and noticed how bad the housing was. Saturday. Hopped the metro; ended up in a ghetto looking neighborhood. Entered city government building, high on security. Passed two guys on the street corner. One actually dealt respect to this lone stranger. That was a pleasant moment of surprise. This is why I like it here--sometimes something beautiful happens. I keep thinking about how sheltered my youth was. It is nice to be able to walk alone down the street and come upon people. I like that. My grandmother would fret if she heard I walked the streets by myself. Conservatism like that... I'm sure the macho-protector (sorry I don't know the proper psychological term) has some reason to why it was developed. But I really do like to be able to fend independently for myself and interact with whoever I want to-up or down. Meaning that one day I may meet the C.(Brass), or the VP, and another a stranger on the street. Does it surprise you to believe that the P wouldn't acknowledge me if we met in the halls, but the man on the street would? I mean eye contact is also acknowledgement-if you've become sophisticated to such circles. I remember the individual who has some stars who walked past and made the eye contact. I don't look away. Well in that kind of body language a message is passed at the unconscious level. And most people don't like it. If this makes any sense, I'm amazed. M Street (Washington, D.C.) The name M Street refers to two major thoroughfares in the United States capital of Washington, D.C. Because of the Cartesian-coordinate-based street-naming system in Washington, the name "M Street" can be used to refer to any east-west street located twelve blocks north or south of the dome of the United States Capitol (not thirteen blocks, as there is no J Street). Thus, there are streets called M Street in all four quadrants of the city, which are disambiguated by quadrant designations, namely, M Street, N.W., N.E., S.W., and S.E. (I went to the SW Quadrant) Southwest is part of Pierre L'Enfant's original city plans and includes some of the oldest buildings in the city (1791). After the Civil War, the Southwest Waterfront became a neighborhood for the poorer classes of Washingtonians. Each ethnic group had its streets surrounding their religious institutions. Waterfront developed into a quite contradictory area: it had a thriving commercial district with grocery stores, shops, a movie theater, as well as a few large and elaborate houses (mostly owned by wealthy blacks). However, most of the neighborhood was a very poor shantytown of tenements, shacks, and even tents. In the 1950s urban renewal became the key term of congress. The city declared eminent domain over all land south of the National Mall and north of the Anacostia River (except Fort McNair); evicted virtually all of its residents and businesses; destroyed all streets, buildings, and landscapes; and started again from scratch. Only a few buildings were left intact. Current architecture of the time was brutalist style. However, urban renewal did not fully succeed in Southwest for many of the reasons that plagued other Modernist renewal efforts. Areas of the neighborhood remained run-down, low-income, and somewhat dangerous. This situation intensified in the 1980s and the 1990s, when Washington had among the lowest per capita incomes and highest crime rates in the nation. While many of the residential neighborhoods of Southwest remained both highly mixed-race and mixed-income through this time, around 2003, the wave of new development occurring throughout DC reached Southwest. H20, an enormously popular nightclub, opened on the riverfront, while a number of apartment buildings began extensive renovations and condominium conversions. Residential and commercial developers began to take a more serious interest in Southwest with the announcement in 2004 that the city would build the new Washington Nationals baseball stadium just across South Capitol Street from Southwest. Politically, Southwest includes most of Ward 2, as well as parts of Wards 6 and 8. Most of the residential section of Southwest lies in Ward 6. Sunday-I took KC and her mother, who is visiting DC, out for breakfast at Madeleine's then down to Virginia with my car then when we got back I took them downtown in the metro to see the Whitehouse, It was cold out, but we had absolutely so much fun together. They had never seen much of that stuff either, though I've seen plenty of similar things throughout my experiences. The thing that I found impressive was the Lincoln Gallery. The Washington Monument was really cool too because there were people flying kites and in the background airplanes taking off out of Reagan. It was very artistic with the blooming trees. I think we will go back again. Finally I got to see the acapella group who were in Union Metro Central. KC's mum got down to boogie with them, and some white kid was getting some groove on in the front too, it was pretty cute. I thanked the singers because they let mum groove and do her thing there. That was awful sweet of them. In fact there was a lot of compassion shown to me today by the folks of DC. One young lady leant her a tissue when she got upset and cried about the hard times she endured with a man. And a few others were sociable towards them when we walked. Also Keyetta liked pointing out that she thinks even though she has had a kid my booty is bigger than hers. Hm!!! :D Funny though, I have found my little sister again. All in all I had a great time. It made me uncomfortable to try and understand mum because she's got such a southern Georgia country accent that I can't understand her sometimes. And then she started crying when I didn't understand why. That didn't annoy me inasmuch as made me concerned that I couldn't offer her compassion when she was upset. But she was ok. She is a sweet lady and I admire her courage. She's probably around 50 years old and she dares to tackle the city with us, two young ladies under 30. She is excited because she is from the country and hasn't seen city before. But I think we opened her eyes a bit today. She got to see Martin Luther King's engraving at the memorial. She got to see the Whitehouse. And she got over her fear of heights to enter the metro, trying something entirely new! It makes me sad to see what men do to women by repressing a woman's confidence. She told me about walking for 27 miles to 'get her mind straight'. I cannot imagine it. There are things which happen in life that I have been sheltered from. Hardships that I cannot comprehend, and hope never to see. But there are also people in need of advocates and assistance from people with hearts like mine. If nothing else, this would be mission essential enough. |
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gwynde's journal